Bridesmaids – First Class

 

HELEN: And then we’re going to the MGM Grand Wet Republic Ultra Pool. The people from the Real World go there all the time.

LILLIAN: I’m so excited! Hey buddy, how ya doin’?

ANNIE: I’m goooood. I’m so much more relaxed now. Thank you Helen. I just feel like I’m excited, I’m relaxed, I’m ready to paaaaarrrtttyyyy…

(starts singing)

…with the best of them. And I’m

gonna go down to the river!

LILLIAN: Wow, it looks like someone is really relaxing now.

ANNIE: What are you guys talking about up here?

HELEN: We’re going to a restaurant tonight, I know the owner…

ANNIE: You do? Oooh, Helen. Woo woo. Helen knows the owner. Big whoop.

LILLIAN: Hey Annie, let’s go take a nap. What do you say?

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Miss, you cannot be up here.

ANNIE: Hello grandpa. I’m sorry, I just want to be up here with my friends. I’m with this group.

LILLIAN: Yeah, can she just stay up here for a while? The sign’s off.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: No. Coach passengers aren’t allowed up here in first class. It’s policy. Sorry.

ANNIE: Gosh, this plane is very strict. Welcome to Germany. Okay, I’m gonna go take a nap.

LILLIAN: I think that’s a good idea.

ANNIE: Catch you on the flip side m****s!

LILLIAN: I’m sorry, she’s –

ANNIE: I’m leaving. This should be open, it’s civil rights. This is the 90’s.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Right, it’s not. You’re in the wrong decade.

ANNIE: You are.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Okay right, I am.

LILLIAN: Holy s***, what did you give her?

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Miss.

ANNIE: No, it’s not me.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Yes, it’s you. Please go back to your seat.

ANNIE: I’m with him. I’m Mrs. Iglesias.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: No you’re not. You were just up here and you put sunglasses on. Out.

ANNIE: I don’t want to.

HELEN: She can have my seat. Everyone should experience first class in their lives and I don’t want Annie to miss out just because she couldn’t afford a ticket.

FEMALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: I’m afraid it’s not allowed, ma’am.

ANNIE: Help me, I’m poor.

LILLIAN: Please. We’re a whole wedding party, I’m the bride. I’m getting married. The seat is empty. She’s obviously nervous. We’ll calm her down.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: I understand, but Claire is right –

ANNIE: Everyone get back to your seats.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: You especially. You have three seconds to get back to your seat.

ANNIE: You can’t get anywhere in three seconds.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Well, you’ve gotta try.

ANNIE: You’re setting me up for a loss already. Whatever you say… (reading his name tag) Stove.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: It’s Steve.

ANNIE: Stove, what kind of name is that.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: That’s not a name. My name is Steve.

ANNIE: Are you an appliance?

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: No, I’m a man and my name is Steve.

ANNIE: You’re a flight attendant.

MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT: That’s absolutely accurate.